6 Books That Can Help You Heal From Toxic Parenting From Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) Mothers
Experts believe that being raised by a toxic mom can affect you in a lot of ways, some of them not very subtle.
As a child, you might not have realized how deeply having a toxic mom affected you. But now that you’re an adult, you may have started recognizing some differences in the way you relate with your mom compared to how others relate with theirs.
You may also have noticed that you are unable to keep a steady relationship with friends and lovers for a long time without doing something stupid to break up those friendships.
Many of the effects of such upbringing are subtle, and according to experts, there are several ways that this can have a lasting effect long into adulthood. But rather than trying to just work through these issues on your own, it’s best to turn to other people who can help and support you as you heal.
The worst memory of childhood and young adulthood for many grownups is that of feeling lonely, unloved, and unappreciated. Very often they were unable to tell anyone their family life so as not to be judged and also because mothers were believed to be made of pure gold. In fact, many kids from mothers with Borderline Personality Disorder grew up thinking their life was quite normal.
If only they know back then that not all mothers are good, that it was possible for some to be troubled, sick, and fighting their own demons. That below the exterior, they are incapable of loving themselves, and invariably not capable of also loving their children. Such children are those kids who suffer in silence, just like you.
Fortunately for kids like that, there are a few professionals who have studied the long-term effects of this kind of toxic parenting and have authored books that are aimed at helping such kids overcome the effects of such kind of parenting they received while growing up.
The following books are some of the most recommended ones and are available in popular stores including Amazon around the world.
When Your Mother Has Borderline Personality Disorder: A Guide for Adult Children by Daniel S. Lobel PhD
In no particular order, the first on our list will be the book “When Your Mother Has Borderline Personality Disorder” by Daniel S. Lobel Ph.D. It is a book that talks about understating the patterns and reasons behind such a mother’s behavior as well as arming you with the tools needed to get you started.
It also suggests ways of reconciliation and overcoming the complicated thoughts associated with such forms of issues.
The book contains:
A comprehensive introduction to what BPD is and the associated challenges
The experiences of people who grow up with mothers who have BPD
The uncertainty and the roller coaster of emotional instability they experience
How to rise above the challenges and manage your relationships if you haven’t already started
The various ways you can practice self-care so that you do not continue the cycle
The healing process and what more you can do
Defining your future without the baggage
Understanding the Borderline Mother: Helping Her Children Transcend the Intense, Unpredictable, and Volatile Relationship by Christine Ann Lawson
If there is a book worthy of being an authority in this field, then Christine Ann Lawson should be the one. In her books, she was able to explain how the different classifications of the Borderline mother impact how she relates with her kids. Not all BPD are born equal and so are the effects of such mothers on their children.
Christine in her book can show her readers how it is possible to heal from toxic parenting and why you should save yourself. That is not all, it contains easy-to-understand steps on how to achieve all of these.
Surviving a Borderline Parent (How to Heal Your Childhood Wounds and Build Trust, Boundaries, and Self-Esteem) by Kimberlee Roth (Author), Freda B. Friedman (Author), Randi Kreger (Author)
Another very interesting book in this series is “Surviving a Borderline Parent”. This book was written by three authors which implies that the book will be a robust exposition on the subject matter.
It is a step-by-step guide for adult children of parents with borderline personality disorder and teaches adult children how to overcome the devastating effects of growing up with a parent who suffers from BPD.
If you were raised by a BPD parent, your childhood was a volatile and painful time. This book, the first written specifically for children of borderline parents, offers step-by-step guidance to understanding and overcoming the lasting effects of being raised by a person suffering from this disorder will help you learn how to start up the process of healing. In this book, you will uncover specific coping strategies for dealing with issues like low self-esteem, lack of trust, guilt, and hypersensitivity common to children of borderline parents.
Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: How to Heal from Distant, Rejecting, or Self-Involved Parents by Lindsay C. Gibson (Author)
This book is a must-have for anyone who grew up with an emotionally immature, unavailable, or selfish parent, that may have lingering feelings of anger, loneliness, betrayal, or abandonment. It is a book for those whose only recollections of their childhood are a time when their emotional needs were not met. A period when their feelings were dismissed, or even worse make to take up adult levels of responsibility in an effort to compensate for the misbehavior of their parents.
This book exposes the destructive nature of parents who are emotionally immature or unavailable and how the effects of these parents, creating a sense of neglect, impact these kids. That is not all, in this book you will discover ways to heal from the pain and confusion caused by this unfortunate early form of childhood. The book will show you how to free yourself from your parents’ emotional immaturity, start the process of recovering your true nature, control how you react to them, and avoid disappointment. Finally, you’ll learn how to create positive, new relationships so you can build a better life.
Stop Walking on Eggshells: Taking Your Life Back When Someone You Care About Has Borderline Personality Disorder by Paul Mason (Author)
Eggshells are fragile, which is what happens to people who become unusually conscious of themselves. With more than one million people already benefiting from it, this book answers a lot of mental health issues including dealing with BPD issues. It covers a broad range of mental health illnesses and how schema therapy can help in coping and communicating. Adults who were raised by BPD mothers can also benefit from using the tools in this book to learn how to stabilize their relationships with their BPD mothers.
When your Mom has Borderline Personality Disorder
How to be a Warrior, Heal Childhood Wounds, Build Self-Esteem and End your Suffering Paperback by LINSY B (Author)
If you are a victim of toxic parenting, especially from a toxic mother who had BPD, then this book is definitely for you. If you are not sure if your parents should be described as toxic parents then if your life has been a struggle with self-esteem, anger, depression, and maintaining relationships with friends and lovers, it is time to suspect that your upbringing may have played a role in that especially when your relationship with your mother is not a very loving one.
This book shows how heartbreaking the experience of a child with borderline personality disorder can be, how the instability, emotional volatility, self-injury, and suicide attempts can be very draining and devastating for the emotions of the child and leave them feeling lost, helpless, and alone.
This book helps you recognize that you are not to blame for your mother’s behavior with steps you can take that will aid you in healing some of your wounds.
This book was written for young kids who presently have to live with a mother who does not seem to understand them. It shows them various tips, tricks, and ways of handling various situations.
It is also written for adults who grew up in homes where they suffered various forms of abuse from their mothers while growing up.
It also comes with a workbook that you can use as a form of self-help towards the process of healing or detoxification by first building your self-esteem.
This is a great gift or presents to give a friend, spouse, or lover who you suspect suffers from this kind of situation.
